Humor

A Romantic Valentine’s Date Slightly Modified for my Bad Back

Love hurts

WhatTheZem
2 min readFeb 14, 2023

--

Photo by julien Tromeur on Unsplash

Hi sweetie, I’ve planned the perfect romantic evening for us. I hope you don’t mind, but I’ve modified a few things to accommodate my lower back pain.

First, I’ll bring you your second favorite flowers: tulips. I know you love orchids the most and the store had plenty of them, but they were on the bottom shelf, and I just couldn’t bend over that far.

I got us a hotel room in the city. It will be secretly stocked with some sexy surprises: a champagne bottle on ice, chocolate covered strawberries, and my inversion table.

Before we go out, we’ll take a steaming hot 45-minute shower, mostly in hopes that it’ll loosen up my lumbar region.

Then I’ll take your hand and gently guide it towards my coat so you can help me put it on.

I’ve hired a horse-drawn carriage to take us three blocks to the theater. But since there’s no way I can climb into that thing I’ll cancel it and we’ll take an Uber with sensible and (hopefully) heated seats.

We’ll go see the Broadway musical Six since it’s got the shortest runtime at about an hour twenty (with no intermission!) because sitting in theater seats too long will be torture.

--

--

WhatTheZem
WhatTheZem

Written by WhatTheZem

Kurt is just trying to put more humor in the world. Please consider supporting him here: https://medium.com/@kzem/membership